Last night I was waiting for my husband to get home, so I turned on the television. With not much to choose from, I settled on the XFactor. I wasn't a fan of it last year. I found Simon Cowel to be brutal and the poor choice of holding court at their homes to be both offensive and rude. I vowed to never watch the show again, but last night, there I was somewhat mindlessly watching it while at the same time I was wrapping up some emails.
After a group called Emblem 3 really impressed me, I found myself getting more involved. Next came a sad man who once did a duet with Britnay Spears (one of XFactor's new judges.) Shock and dismay spread over the stage as the man disolved in front of them. His voice gone his performance was painful to watch. After each judge said 'no' his somewhat odd concern that he had hurt Britney by auditioning left me feeling uncomfortable and worried for Britney.
By the time Jillian Jensen arrived on stage, I was fully emeshed in the show. Jillian stood in front of the judges, a bit timid and connected with judge Demi Lovato who in 2011 spoke out about her own bullying experiences. Demi was bullied because she was fat which lead her to both physically and emotionally abuse herself.
Jillian spoke of kids calling her, playing her songs back to her over the phone and laughing and making fun of her, taunting her that she couldn't sing. She shared that she would often curl into a ball and cry herself to sleep.
Yet here she was, standing in front of millions of people ready to show the world that she could indeed sing.
On these shows, you hold your breath with lead-ups like this. She was either going to be amazing or we were all going to feel incredibly sorry for her. As she launched into her song, it was clear, she was amazing.
As I listened to both Jillian and Demi share their bullying stories, I thought about my own bullying experiences and it moved me to write my "Life As A Conscious Mom" blog post for today: What Would Ever Possess A Child To Be So Mean?
Parents, grandparents, teachers, and care providers should all read this post. The conversaton needs to start with us and it needs to start when our kids are young. We need to teach our kids that words hurt just as much as a punch, we need to teach our kids that power by causing diminish isn't power, it's cruelty and we need to teach them to learn how to validate themselves from within. We also need to teach our children that those who use words and physical action to diminish another are the ones with the problem. A child who knows that they are not the problem, but merely the trigger for someone else's insecurities may be able to better deal with bullying when it happens.
Here is the link to today's post
The Conscious Mom